Modern Vagrant is an online resource dedicated to the plight of the disenfranchised.

Down-and-out? Whacked on smack? Just a lazy bum? This site is for you.

Need cash quick?
Practice these lines...

Can you spare any change?
A bed and a meal for the night.
Love one another, God bless ya.

Top-10 Panhandling Ruses

Shelter Sex:
The Most Romantic Facilities in Your Hood

Benchtop PC Reviews

ATM Locator: Where People With Money Be At

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Get unrestricted access for less than a fifth of schnapps

Flop House
Check in & talk trash

Where losers become winners

E-Mail Us
Or just mumble to
yourself incoherently

My last meal was: free polls 

While this site is not serious, homelessness is. Please contribute to the
National Coalition for the Homeless.

Money & Finance
7 aggressive panhandling techniques guaranteed to net you $7/day

Retire after only 625,000 returned cans & bottles

Matted hair is back!

Trend-setting garbage bag garb that'll make you look like 15 cents

Is your dandruff crawling?

Park bench ratings for 12 major cities

Food & Dining
10 mouthwatering recipes for stale moldy bread

The latest all-weather wireless benchtop PCs


Bag bag-ladies and crack whores with these time-tested pickup lines

Rid yourself of swollen chapped heroin hands in just 3 weeks

Law Line
Enact your squatter's rights to establish residence atop a heating grate

Gimme Shelter
101 decorating ideas to turn your fridge box into a home

Dumpster diving tips & tricks

A&P unveils 6.45 cubic-foot ball-bearing shopping cart

Terms of Service

You are vagrant # 63,213 to have loitered here

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